What's NOT happening

At some point between June 29 and last week, I went from fire in my belly to a burned-out candle.  Thats really is the best way to describe it.

Injuring my hamstring has sucked all the life and mojo out of me.  I have thrown everything at it, PT, ART, Acupuncture, Chiro, Massage, Mobility, Rehab, and more.   It's not 100% or even 90%, it is a dull ache that is tolerable when I run slow, but it feels like there is a dial on the attachment and the pain increases as I run faster.  I wake up every day wondering if it will feel better or worse, what can or can I not do, what aggravates it ....

My plan was  to "manage" the pain, take off all expectations for the race and just be happy to be at the start line in Kona.  But for FS fucks sake if you know me, well, we all know that is not my jam.  I tried, I really did.   I wanted to be excited to go and " see what the day holds"  "see how it unfolds," "enjoy the experience" but I can't or won't.  Add to that my fire to race it out, I just don't have it. Being injured is exhausing.  And I just have not had my usual mojo all race season.  I LOVE racing but form Oceanside to HONU to Boulder to SC, I was just not having fun and that is telling to me. 

It's not about the results, I've had some good results and some bad results this year, it's about my mojo.    I've had my inner voice talking to me for a while, but I have ignored it...until yesterday.  I had to listen. 

This is a decision that only I can make, of course, I have consulted my husband, coach, and a few close friends, but at the end of the day, it's me.   For those who have done an Ironman, you know what it takes, and if you have done Kona, you know what that takes-we all leave a piece of our soul out there.  You have to toe the line at that race with 110%!   I just don't have it...


I am listening to my that voice and am not going to race in Kona this year.      And the sense of relief I feel is palatable... that tells me this is the right choice for ME.

IDNF

To DNF is "did not finish"  and for those who know me, this is not in my mantra.  You FNMW "finish no matter what"  Walk, crawl, take a nap... get it done.  But an IDNF is "intentionally did not finish" as in the plan was not to finish.  Why? My hamstring is not 100%, and I  have an Ironman in October.

To digress, "the injury"  Hamstring tendinopathy.  A literal "pain in the butt"  Not that is diagnosis was easy to come by, I have seen 6 +  "people" and have had multiple diagnoses.  My insurance, which I pay $700 a month for  PPO denied the MRI request by my Dr. until I did 4 weeks of "approved PT"  They would not accept the 3 weeks of ART, Acupuncture, Estim, Shockwave therapy... as "accepted" treatment. I call BS.  I found a cash pay MRI and had it done, I needed to know was it my hamstring, my glute, my piriformis, my adductor, or something no one identified.  And was it pulled, strained, torn, etc.  No, it's just inflamed and pissed off.  Treatment? Time off,  okay I will be doing that 10/13/19.

I took 3 weeks off running - I know not enough time, but it is 90% better, and I can run with a dull ache vs. severe pain.  The caveat is I cannot run fast.  New plan for Kona, LSM, long slow miles, get the time in with a low HR and see what happens...   10.12 we shall see.  Smart? Not sure, but if the pain were worse or terrible, I would shut it all down.  It the risk was a significant injury, no go but I have been increasing running, and the pain is decreasing as long as I am SAF.  slowasfuck.

So Boulder 70.3?  I was coming out to the coach, see family anyway and just train but last Sunday I was able to run 1 hour so we (coach and I ) decided to swim/bike and run 1 + loop.  I swam and biked as I would in any 70.3 - same effort and since I was not tapered and I am at 5000+ feet this was not easy.  I ran 1 loop 6.5 miles without pain.  I would lie if  I did not consider walk/running loop 2 for the finish!  But my eye is on October, so I stopped, turned in my chip, chatted with Mike for 10 min and then knocked out 2.5 miles for a 9-mile day!  WIN-WIN!   I had the fun of swim/bike, and I got in 9 miles, and I am NOT hurting today.  So to say I am happy about my IDNF- yes!

What will the big dance bring in October? Not sure but I am going I am racing and am thankful to have the opportunity.   After being told, "you are not made for the heat" " you should consider cool races, physiologically you cannot perform in the heat" It's hard to go all-in with high expectations.  Add the hammie and let's go to Kona to have fun, enjoy the day and do the best I can.  More on my "heat issue" in this article ( 1/2 way down is the recap on my Korey Stringer testing."

On a side note, since  I am spending $ right and left on treatment, I added the Hypervolt to my arsenal.   Expensive, yes, worth it yes.  I use it twice a day on my hamstring and a good 10+minutes on sore legs.  I think it's fantastic! 

Bad things come in 3's?

EVIL EVIL EVIL

Do they?  Not sure but I had 3 +.  But let me start by saying when I say "bad" it is relative bad, North County Problems as we call them.  Evil is Cancer, living in Syria, being separated from your children at the border while seeking amnesty, so believe me, I understand that my life is blessed!


But in MY world...


1:  INJURY :3 weeks ago toward the end of a great run with some fast repeats, my hamstring was cranky, enough to notice but just a touch- not anything significant.  2 days later during some pickups it was barking at me, so I backed off the effort a bit and just ran.  Still, nothing that stressed me out.  I rolled it out and did not give it much thought.  Two days later I went out for a shakeout run - pre: race and it was searing pain in my glute/hamstring.  Stabbing pain - something is seriously wrong.   I walked home and hopped on the bike for short spin, and that was painful.   Something is "broken" I bailed out of the race, sad face, and hoped it would go away as quickly as it came here we are three weeks later and let's say it has not departed.  I have had ART, PT, massage, Acupuncture, and more.   I shut down running and biking at first, then was able to bike without pain, so that is good, I am running on the Alter G at 85% weight without pain but cannot run outside without pain.  I've been super positive, super negative,  level headed, over the top emotional about it and may have drunk a bottle of wine and had a tantrum or 5.    Boulder 70.3 is off the table, and the clock is ticking for the big show in October!  I have a hard date for making the call, if I am not running X by X date, then Kona is off the table. I will not go to go.  I have raced there enough to know I need to be at 100% to race the race I want to.    The MRI is Friday, and that may make the call for me, if it's something  "major" then I deal with that and go to plan B, whatever that may be.  Or maybe it just keeps getting better.  So for all of you who are complaining about your run workouts, "shut the F up"  I'd LOVE to be running!!!


2:  TOOTH:  You likely do not know or care, but I was hit in the face in college with a baseball, and one tooth was knocked out and three others "died"  My #2-4th teeth crowns + a bridge.  Well, in any case, shortly after I jacked my hamstring, I was eating dinner and realized my 2nd tooth was loose and out it came.   The crown fell off, and there you have a stump left.   I happen to be VERY anal about teeth, and the idea of the hillbilly look mortified me.  Of course, this was on a Tuesday night, and my dentist office has NO Dr in on Wednesdays. WTF?  So I had an appt for Thursday. I could wedge the tooth in and look presentable.  I  had to take it out to eat, so I was not eating out

DIY Dentistry

anywhere.  Wed AM I was swimming and realized it had fallen out. Nearly died, 1000% panic. Thankfully I was in a clean pool!!  I put on my fins and was skimming the bottom of the pool and whamo I found it.  So I carefully hid it.  I managed all day no issues.  Thur AM I go swimming and had to take it out to have my mouth.  So my lips are sealed to prevent anyone from seeing the gaping hole in my mouth. I am talking with my hand in front of my face, my paddle makes a good shield and then some guy who I don't know, says, "hey you have something in your tooth."  I nearly die....OMG, what??  How come I can go ALL day with kale between my teeth and NO one says anything but this guy, Captain Observant has to notice.   I just put my head in the water and swam away.   What I thought would be a quick re-glue appointment was a " the tooth that is left is broken, we have to rebuild it and make a new crown"  3.5 hours later and an $1800 bill I left!   And of course the temporary crown broke the following Saturday- again NO office open, so I superglued it back in.   DIY Dentistry at its best.


3: POISON OAK:  My husband is on a " journey across the US" He has wanted to drive to Rhode Island, his home state for a long time and I have 0 not even 1% interest in going but I 100% support him and his adventure.  He took off on July 4!  So I am a single mom with two high energy dogs, and I CAN'T run them!  So we get creative with dog beach, ball throwing, lots of trail walks - one memorable one at 4 am when Roo rolled in a dead snake and then the following day she caught a rabbit.  Fun times!   Last Thursday night I decided to take them on a hike up and around Double Peak. Great hike and they chose the route down which was undoubtedly a coyote trail and make for creatures under 2 feet tall, so I was doing a lot of bushwhacking.  Not once, ever did it occur to me that it was Poison Oak.
  
 

Well, 24 hours later, I realized it as it started breaking out ALL over my arms and legs.  PO is another of my nemesis.  I am highly reactive, so I knew I needed medical intervention + $150 of OTC products.   As soon as I realized it was loofing, scrubbing, with zanfel and Tecnu and applying anything to stop the itching.  All the OTC products  + some help from the Dr and I was able not to kill myself.  Double Benadryl and wine got me to sleep but only for a few hours.   And this continues.  See not realizing I was in PO, to begin with, I left the oils all OVER.   So sheet, towels, chairs, cars seats  etc-  so while the initial outbreak starts to get better,  I have new spots popping up all over, random places.  Can I say a complete F'ing nightmare?  And well my body loves PO so much that it becomes systemic, that is, it can spread throughout the body internally.   So that my friends is what I am dealing with now!



You could call the leak under the sink #4. But well we will let that go for now.

  Seriously it could be a lot worse I know....but I'm ready for things to lighten up.   John is somewhere in PA right now, eta back home Saturday.   Maybe by then the red oozing welts will be gone...

Korey Stringer Institute Follow up

What I feel like in the heat

I finally got "my results" from my day of hell testing at the Korey Stringer Institute.  Detailed reports, graphs and analysis and a follow-up call with Dr. Robb, his team and my coach.   The call was thorough and here are the takeaways

1: Avoid Hot Races are you f'ing kidding me?  I did this test as prep for Kona
2: If it's hot, you will need to slow down.  
3: that was IT no more options.... after a painful pause I speak up, " Dr. Rob we are going to need more options"

I just paid a lot of money to be told, DON'T go to Kona or if you do be prepared to go really slow... WTF! 

Thankfully the call did not end after the first 7 minutes of "information"   

We took a deep dive to see how f'cked I really am much I really lose.  

Test 1: Substrate Utilization Test:  Bottom line is biking with a giant mask and every 5 min increasing my power by 11 minutes to determine carbohydrate and fat utilization.   People talk about the crossover point when your body goes from burning fat to carbs, well there was NO crossover as in my body burns 100% carbs.  Not that I thought I was fat adapted, as you all know how I feel about Keto and endurance sports, but seriously, I am a carb machine.

Bike Electrolyte Test:  2 hours IM Watts in 90 degrees and 80% humidity.  I lose 60+ oz an hour with 2180mg of sodium.  For reference a large bike bottle is 24oz,  so that is 2.5 bottles an hour and a lot of sodium and potassium.   This is actually 3.4% of my body weight- turns out that is not a sustainable loss.    So you say, drink more and take in more salt!  Well yes, I am dramatically under hydrating but the caveat is that most guts can only handle a max of  40oz an hour - so that leaves me 20oz short x 10-11 hours and well we know what happens... And 2180 mg of sodium an hour is a fast track to GI distress.  

Run Electrolyte Test:  1 hour but had to end early due to core temp.   Same hot and humid conditions and I was now dumping 74 oz an hour and 2660 mg of sodium.  So... I get off the bike in a hole and then sweat more!

Alaskaman here I come!

At least I know I am not crazy, weak, am imagining the issues I have in the heat.  And and... on the run, my core temp hit 103.9 which is when we had to stop, but that is when I start seeing black spots, the headache comes and dizziness-hello Honu!   

So now what...

1- Getting heat acclimated will help!  So I play to go to Kona 3 weeks early and 5 weeks out will plan a 4-day camp in Tucson or the like to kick start the acclimation.  Doing hot yoga etc along the way.
2 - Train the gut to accept more fluids and sodium.  I am trying a few new products to achieve this and will report back later.  
3- Don't be surprised if I run in Kona with a Camelbak,   There is no way I can get in enough fluids on the run drinking out of dixie cups with 3 oz.   I do my long runs with one now and it works!   

When I hung up the phone I wanted to cry, okay dramatic, my thoughts were why even try again?  I have everything working against me, I cannot change genetics,  what will be different this time? 

Goal is NO med tent in 2019! 

I am outfitted with knowledge and have some new plans and I am NOT READY TO GIVE UP!! 

Ironman Hawaii 70.3 2019

 I have avoided this race at all cost never raced here before because I detest the heat and historically fall apart it has never worked into my schedule time-wise.  

This year it was purposeful, planned and one of my key races.  So an A race!  I finished yesterday with my slowest 70.3 time , slower than my first race and my lowest placement.  But I finished, which for me was not about the medal or hat or another black itchy shirt, it was about a place that continues to humble me, strip me down and I refused to let Madam Pele win yesterday.

The swim, slow, but slow for most - It is hands down the most beautiful swim I have ever done. My heart loves DigMeBeach in Kona but Hapuna Bay is truly an aquarium.   AG waves but with 4 at a time rolling start within the wave, so closer to real racing.   I was wave 19!  Ye 50 minutes after the first men's wave, so lots of time on the beach waiting and watch, but I was surrounded by friends and competitors and it was just plain fun!     I loved every minute of the swim, sighting was a bit challenging but not too congested.  Swim 31:53

Bike,  I know this course and was beyond thrilled to be starting it midway.  And the new bike, the Cervelo P5 is a slice of heaven.  It's comfortable, fun and feels really fast.  Than you Skip and Nytro Multisport. I opted for 808's, which I have not ridden in a while and the crosswinds in Havi reminded me how they can be a bit squirley.  The winds were mild for Kona.  Headwind up to Havi, with the last 4 miles pretty strong, but that descent yeah baby!!!  20 min for the last 4 miles up and the 10 min down. And to make that turn into Waimea vs the 24 miles back to Kona was just bittersweet!   So so fun!    Bike: 2:40:59

It was hot, Garmin was reading 91 out on the Queen K, and humid, but I expected nothing less.   I drank 5x 24 oz bottles 3x Gatorade Endurance  + 2x water.   16oz = 1lb, so I took in 23 lbs ( per se of fluid)  4000 mg of sodium.   I felt great on the bike the only red flag was I did not have to pee.   

Off the bike and I was immediately dizzy, not a good sign but got through T2 and onto the run.   I had a, very hot,  180z bottle with 1000 mg of sodium that I was started drinking and got in mile 1-3.  The first few miles generally come easy in a 70.3 I was struggling, I knew it was going to be tough, but that is okay,  Mile 4, IT, started, black spots, dizziness and that feeling of I just may pass out,  I know now that means my core temp is geeting high and there is one way to get it down, slow down and drink more.  I spend a solid minute at the next aid station with ice, sponges, drinking and getting in what could and ran to the next aid station thinking I would have to manage the run that way.  Then nausea set in and I was worried if I drank more it would come back up.  Mile 5 I had to lay down, in the grass - stop the spinning and feel " better".  Not sure how long it was but then I was up again and it was walking/ run/ triage at every aid station.  Approaching the run turn around was the hardest part of the day,  I wanted to walk into medical, fall on a gurney and get ice, maybe an IV.  But I just could not let this Island win, so it was game on and it was not pretty.   I would  "run"  a minimum of 100 steps with the goal of 200, and then walk 50, which sometimes was 100.   I took one more mini nap and just clicked off the miles.  I quit triathlon 10x, took up knitting, started to curse Madam Pele but stopped and thanked her for this opportunity to test my self.  I can race well in cool temps can get the results I want, but this, place, this heat, is my test!  I am not willing to give up yet.   Run 2:35:24- at least it was not slower than my bike split - LOL.

So yes I went to KSI for testing, yes I learned some info but I do not have the report from them yet,  His goal was last week but likely 2 weeks from when I was there.    

Watching my AG on the podium is fuel to figure this out, watching people claim their Kona slots still brings tears to my eyes.  I love this sport and all the blood, sweat and tears that goes into it! 

So there you have it, we ALL have bad days out there!  

Korey Stringer Institute Day 2

Today I paid a lot of money to sweat out 6.7lbs, get my core temp to 103.9, see lots of black spots and have to end the session early due to delirium.  Hey it was just like racing in Kona.   So mission accomplished.

For the past 24 hours, I have been urinating in what looks like a portable gas can.  At 2AM I swallowed a thermometer pill.  I have recorded in detail everything I ate and drank since noon yesterday.   I showed up at the lab at 8, was given my freshly laundered bike kit and was soon walking into the death zone heat chamber, which was set at 86 degrees and 78% humidity.  aka Kona conditions, except for last year, Dr. Rob noted because WE ALL KNOW LAST YEAR WAS THE BEST CONDITIONS IN KONA EVER! NO SHIT I digress, I walked in and said “fuck it is hot”

Onto the bike for a 2-hour bike session at IM watts, GO.  This was not as easy as I hoped, in fact my RPE was very high, and I am hoping the Kickr was not calibrated or I am looking at a 7-hour bike split.  I held the watts mostly and when my HR started to go up, instead of backing off as I would in a race I just let it go up.  Apparently, that is not a good idea, my core temp was going up too and let’s just say a 2 hour IM bike workout soon felt like a 2 hour FTP test.  3.5 bottles later, lots of good tunes and a Netflix movie “Kim Swims” which I highly recommend, I was done.  Meanwhile, I am wiping sweat, Maggie was wiping sweat and they were collecting sweat.   Dr. Rob is monitoring my core temp and every 10 min they ask on a scale of 14-20 how are you feeling.  Right, what is up with the scale, not 1-5 or 1-10, but 14-20 (it’s actual correlation to HR- 14 should be around 140…”

Then I climb in a giant tub lined with plastic and using distilled water I am washed down, scrub and wash.  I leave my clothes, the towels, and all the yuck and climb on the scale.  Done with test 1.

Gulp down 24 oz fluid  + The Right Stuff and force in a bagel and PB and sit in front of a giant ass fan.  Meanwhile, they are monitoring my core temp, which is taking over 45 min to return to normal.  Normal, okay let's go round 2.

The run, 1 hour, TM at IM effort in the same unreasonably fucking hot temperature Kona condition heat lab.  Music on let's go.  OMG its hot, its really hot, I slow the pace and decide to just run easy, shit I don’t want to run that easy, pick it up, okay it’s only an hour, if you run this pace in Kona, you are golden, 25 minutes, no way can I run this pace, okay slow down, running a bit slower is better than walking, okay this is better, not really but pretend it is, OMG my HR is 165, not really IM heart rate, only 30 more minutes. Then it's like someone turned up the heat and it was 105, HR is over 170 and the spots start to come, dizzy, spots- both white and black, people asking “are you okay?” Me, not really, so I walk a bit, okay 3 min walk, feeling better not really but lets fake it God it’s hot, “did you turn up the temp?”  Maybe its really 100 degrees, oh boy super dizzy, nausea.   Hey, it's just like being on the Queen K. OMG did I pay for this?  WTF.  Run over, what? What, why?  Seems more core temp was 103.7 and climbing.  Dr. Rob says, we have what we need.

Do the baby deer wobble to the tub, rinse wipe off and onto the scale again. I have been weighed more in 24 hours than I have in 10 years.   Sit in front of big ass fan and rationally decide to cancel Honu, cancel Kona and sign for Alaska Man. Seriously…

Dr. Rob says, well it's clear why you have issues, despite all the fluids you are still down 6.7 lbs.  Fuck!  Can we move IMWC to Antarctica?

Next? Full report early next week. 

Korey Stringer Institute

LOVE this "preventing sudden death" 

Day 1 is complete at the KSI:  Korey Stringer Institute on the Campus of UConn in the Department of Kinesiology. They are renowned for their research and expertise in heat and hydration.  A department I am renowned for failing.

My last 2 (or 6)  ironmans were challenging as they resulted in massive weight loss 9 and 6 lbs respectively, foggy memory, black spots, delirium,  GI issues and just not a good time.   Add any other HOT race they have all included upper/lower or sometimes both GI distress - picture that in a porta potty when its 100 degrees, cramping, extreme nausea....  I know I am a heavy sweater 60-74 oz of fluid loss an hour ( known to date) and 1800-2200 mg of sodium. Numbers that are challenging to replace. I have tried so many products and plans and still strugle every HOT Ironman.  So I have come to mecca.  To the place, they do the testing and will give me actual numbers of sweat and sodium loss.

A long day of travel and I rolled in around 8 and unpacked my bike.  First thing I noticed was the plastic piece on the side that prevents something I am sure, was torn off  - see the x that is GONE.  I unpack my bike and put it together, hmmmm, wheel rubbing, try again, and then I see it. Fuck- seat stay is crushed in.  Holy crap, panic and lose my shit  Calmly think about what I can do?  It's 9:00 and I need my bike tomorrow and by the way, I am racing in less than 2 weeks.  Drink a bottle of wine No, I 'm here for testing so I got my stuff together, went to bed and prayed for a diving intervention.

In hindsight, I forgot the pads on the seat stay, although not sure it would have sustained that crash- I tape pool noodles on every OTHER possible place of impact and 100% forgot to protect this area.    I have not packed my bike since August and was in a hurry, chatting on the phone and was remiss.

Got to KSI at 8:30 and we were able to get the bike on the Kickr and using a knife and some electrical tape, we braced it up for the testing.   Today was substrate utilization testing - which is to determine my carb vs fat burning and actual Kcal/hour at various intensities.   All with this lovely mask.  The test was 1:10 starting at 50% of FTP and working up in 5 min increments to 120%, tracking HR/Power.   I don't have full results but here is a shocker I am not a big fat burner...LOL, no kidding not fat adapted. I burn the most fat at 68-72% of FTP, my sweet spot for Ironman.  And burn fewer calories than I hoped had previously thought.  They will work this up and give me the info post-visit.

After the test, we chatted a bit, and then I was given my urine collection canisters- oh yes, 24 hours of collection.   Nothing like walking about with urine in your backpack.  I was also given a log to commence at noon for ALL food/beverage consumption. Detailed as in type, amount, how prepared, brand name, time, restaurant etc.  And my core temperature pill which I swallow between midnight and 4am for the big testing tomorrow.

Rest of the day I am working and hope to check out the campus a bit.  

Tomorrow- 2hour IM bike in Heat Chamber - set at Kona conditions +  1  hour Run